bummer babe
When I was young, and I would complain to my mom about something that had gone wrong during the day, she would say, "Bummer, babe." And that would be all I needed to feel validated about what I was feeling. Validated. Such an important concept, and yet so seldom understood and/or applied.
I believe that as human beings, we obviously crave human interaction. Without it, we become lonely, depressed, heartbroken, and in extreme cases, maybe even suicidal. So why do we put such small emphasis on our interaction with others throughout the day? Why do we forget that everyone is on that quest for validation?
My Main Squeeze is ludicrously talented at validating people that he's never met. His five minutes with the cashier at the grocery store tends to be the highlight of their day. He makes it a point to notice people who would otherwise go unnoticed. Even if it's something so small as to relate with them about how long they've been at work, or celebrating when their shift is almost over, this man makes people feel important. And experts would agree that that's all we're all searching for. Some level of importance, or one could say, validation.
Even as I write about this topic, I'm wondering my purpose behind it. I've got the blues today for some reason. Maybe I didn't get enough sleep last night (cough, yes), maybe I'm living a premonition about the rest of the day, or maybe I'm just craving some validation. Some semblance of attention that would make what I'm feeling okay. The real reason is probably that I've deleted my facebook account once again, and with nowhere to tell the world what I'm feeling or doing instantly, I'm feeling a little lost. I'm unable to wait for their comments on my thoughts, their praise for my pictures, and their celebration with my achievements. However, seeing as how facebook is just a medium for people to post the best things about themselves and their lives, I feel justified in leaving. Through facebook, I'm able to compare all of my ugly insecurities to the very best in people, and that isn't fair. Seldom do we see the real, honest, raw sides of people in their facebook posts. So I quit. And now I'm feeling the side effects. And that's okay.
It's time for me to be a grown up and find real and lasting means of validation. It's time to search out that human interaction. Nothing like being really honest with oneself. Bummer, babe.
I believe that as human beings, we obviously crave human interaction. Without it, we become lonely, depressed, heartbroken, and in extreme cases, maybe even suicidal. So why do we put such small emphasis on our interaction with others throughout the day? Why do we forget that everyone is on that quest for validation?
My Main Squeeze is ludicrously talented at validating people that he's never met. His five minutes with the cashier at the grocery store tends to be the highlight of their day. He makes it a point to notice people who would otherwise go unnoticed. Even if it's something so small as to relate with them about how long they've been at work, or celebrating when their shift is almost over, this man makes people feel important. And experts would agree that that's all we're all searching for. Some level of importance, or one could say, validation.
“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other
people than you can in two years by trying to get other people
interested in you.”
- Dale Carnegie How to Win Friends and Influence People
Even as I write about this topic, I'm wondering my purpose behind it. I've got the blues today for some reason. Maybe I didn't get enough sleep last night (cough, yes), maybe I'm living a premonition about the rest of the day, or maybe I'm just craving some validation. Some semblance of attention that would make what I'm feeling okay. The real reason is probably that I've deleted my facebook account once again, and with nowhere to tell the world what I'm feeling or doing instantly, I'm feeling a little lost. I'm unable to wait for their comments on my thoughts, their praise for my pictures, and their celebration with my achievements. However, seeing as how facebook is just a medium for people to post the best things about themselves and their lives, I feel justified in leaving. Through facebook, I'm able to compare all of my ugly insecurities to the very best in people, and that isn't fair. Seldom do we see the real, honest, raw sides of people in their facebook posts. So I quit. And now I'm feeling the side effects. And that's okay.
It's time for me to be a grown up and find real and lasting means of validation. It's time to search out that human interaction. Nothing like being really honest with oneself. Bummer, babe.
Man, I like that about your dude. What a great quality. It's true, he does have that natural, easy-to-be around personality.
ReplyDeleteAnd man, I feel ya. On days when my social life is glum, I miss that human interaction as well. So I read lots of blogs, ha!
Also, FB is really making people more sad: http://www.plosone.org/article/info:doi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pone.0069841 So it's okay to have glum days :)
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